Thursday, March 12, 2015

So many second thoughts

I can't sleep. I have too much on my mind. 

1. I am having second thoughts about public school. Justin is not having these second thoughts. I am having a really hard time. I help out with lunch at the school once a week.  I get to see both kids with their friends. When I compare Ava last year to this year, I have a really hard time imagining taking her away from her friends. She has really made a good group of friends and it seems like it is just starting to really come together now that the year is a 3rd of the way over. Last year she had friends, but she just kind of floated and didn't really know where to fit in.  What do we do? Do we put in for financial aid? Is scraping by for one more year just delaying the inevitable?

2. Dori. Our dog of 10 years. She has a serious peeing problem and has since the day we got her. I am at my end with her and I sent an email to the adoption place we got her from, never really imagining the address would still be valid. Well it was, and now they are prepared and ready to take Dori back and place her in a foster home. Justin says this is better than putting her down.  She had such horrible anxiety and social issues when we got her, it is hard to imagine that being the kind thing. Keeping her in the cage to keep her from peeing on the floor is also not the kind thing. I know I reached out to them, but I didn't expect an answer so now it all feels very sudden.  What do I tell the kids? How long will the guilt last?