Tuesday, January 11, 2011

what I dread

I have a friend on facebook who has a daughter with a birthmark that matches Ava's and who also has glaucoma. We see some of the same doctors, so we compare notes and share information. We have also talked about our own feelings regarding being the mom's of these awesome little girls. I have only talked to her on the phone a few times and have yet to meet her even though she lives 2 towns over, but I have probably been more honest and open with her regarding my feelings than with anybody else.

Her daughter is also in preschool this year. Ava had her laser treatment on the 30th. My friend's daughter had her laser treatment yesterday. She was feeling fine and went to dance class last night. She wanted to go to school today even though her mom wasn't going to make her. You never know just how bruised up and purple they will be after a treatment until you walk back to recovery. It depends on how wide the laser beam was, how many joules the machine was set for, etc. The other little girl had a treatment in October which didn't leave her very purple so her classmates kind of got eased into it.

They were standing in line ready to go to their classrooms and a couple of her classmates were asking her about her face. Her mom was there with her and they answered how they normally would. "She just had a laser treatment." Very basic stuff since she was talking to 4 year olds. Then the kids in the other class started laughing and pointing and making a big deal about it. Then the little girl started to cry. Then the mom started to cry. The mom was so upset and still crying when she was talking to me on the phone after she got home. She was upset that she cried in front of her daughter and wasn't strong for her, wasn't the example she thought she should be. I didn't have any words of wisdom for her. I just told her I would have cried too.


  1. We as parents can't always be super human. Sometimes we just have to cry. Crying isn't necessarily a sign of weakness, it's a sign of how much we care. She can always tell her daughter that she cried because she loves her so much.


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