Get back, honk a cat!

Things around these parts are busy as always. We are more than half way through the school year. Isla is almost 6 months old. Time is just flying. I always feel like I don't have enough time for anything, but I am trying to at least make sure I have enough time to enjoy the kids during this stage of craziness.

Isla is changing daily.  She rolls both ways, she sings to herself, she can scootch and roll around if given enough time. She isn't eating solid food yet but has tasted a couple things.  I don't think anything magical will change next week when she turns 6 months.  We just might be a little more diligent about trying to feed her food.  Either way, she sits at the table with us during meal times and is a part of everything.

It is also that time of year, the annual "what do we do about school" time of year.  We have come to the conclusion that we are going to do public school next year.  It isn't a for sure thing, we still love our school, we just can't afford it anymore.  We aren't planning to take on more bills or anything like that, just use this next year to get back on track with things and really see what our money looks like,  Justin got a new pay structure at work and it has made it very hard to know whether or not private school is an option.  It could be fine, or we could just completely drown.  If something changes between now and the beginning of the school year, like some anonymous patron decides to pay for tuition or I somehow get offered a job with the same hours and way less money, then we will probably keep them at their current school.  But right now, it looks like public is the way to go.  I have some apprehension about it, but not really.  I am mostly feeling sad about leaving the school we love behind.  We were such a part of everything, and I know the staff loved my kids.  That is going to be really hard.  I am actually afraid I will feel the loss at every single school event I go to until the end of the year, including drop off and pick up.

 Ava is very excited.  She wants to meet new people and get to wear her own clothes.  She does have good friends at the school but she thinks she will see them again at other things.  She is excited about going school shopping.  She says she is excited to have a fresh start and a new chance to be a good student.  That statement in itself makes me question whether or not the private school has actually been that good for her.  Maybe it put too much pressure on her academically?  I have no idea.

Rhys is neutral.  He will be fine.  I have heard that it is hard to transition to public school for first grade only because it will be a lot of review.  The private school can require a lot more school readiness for their kindergarten so less time has been spent this year playing catch up.  They are both excited to take the bus.

I joined a tiny, little, cheap gym and committed to a 9 month Biggest Loser competition beginning Monday.  The length of the commitment is scary.  Finding the time to work out is scary.  Taking my before pictures is scary.  We will see how it goes.  A friend is doing it with me, so at least I am not all in alone.

New year what?

It is a new year. 2015, a year I never even considered happening when I was younger because it was so ridiculous sounding. I didn't make any resolutions. I have goals but I didn't make them just because it is a new year. Winter break ending is a good time for a fresh start. I want to be more organized with my time. I blocked out my week so I knew when I really needed to be working and so it all didn't seem so overwhelming. Monday and Tuesday worked. Now we are on our second day of no school because of freezing wind chills and it has all gone off the rails.

Vanity.

It has been 4 months since the great nail smashing.  I smashed my middle finger in a garage door  I am pretty sure that my finger was broken based on the swelling and lack of mobility.  After a couple days my nail turned black but it was all dried blood underneath so I couldn't drain it.  About 2 months later my nail all fell off. I had a little nub of a nail underneath it so I at least had something.  All the skin that was normally covered by a nail was very dry and gross looking too.  I have finally grown the new nail out to the tip of my finger, at least in the middle of it.  The sides by the cuticles are still shorter.  There is a huge ridge where the new nail was attached to the old nail.  I have another month or so until that will be gone.

What I have learned from this whole thing.  (I do know this is a very shallow type of lesson.)  I am very vain about my nails.  I naturally have nicely shaped nails that are strong and long.  Over the last two years I have always had them painted, and had them done.  It was my one indulgence. Seriously, I have a great friend who generally just does my hair when she has time in her kitchen so I don't go to the salon or anything.  Having one black nail or no nail for the last few months made me realize how much I use my hands to talk, point to things, etc.  I actually think that people care how nice my nails look.  I know they probably don't, but in my mind they do. Maybe I see having the ability to get my nails done, just a simple no chip manicure on a semi-regular basis as an outward sign that my life is going smoothly.  It means I have had the time to go. I have had the spare cash.

At this point, I am waiting for the stars to all align.  I will have 10 full finger nails to have painted.  Isla will last longer between feedings so I can consider being gone for something so frivolous.  Nothing will break or annual dues or fees won't be due.  Income will be steady. And then I am all in.  I will own it.  I have gone without and seen the light.  I love my nails done. Just like I love my cable tv.  In the land of plenty, it is the shallow things you don't realize you will miss until they are gone.